August

Trip to NY was pretty amazing. 4000 miles in two and a half weeks. The kids and I. I drove in NYC for the first and hopefully, last time. The foods delicious, people are nice, friends are great. Traffic, Traffic, Smelly. I am not a city girl.. Next up, Upstate NY where we saw the house I lived in until I was 10, their age. Pictured above was my backyard, my playground as a child. I had a rowboat and parents that trusted me with it. I think i was about 7 when they started letting me go out in it alone. We camped in Pennsylvania and stayed with friends in Chatham, NY. Camping and caverns, and friends along the way home in NC. And all along the road, Art and Nature. Museums and parks. The kids did lots of reading and drawing and playing in the car. We packed our own snacks and drinks, and brought our cloth napkins.. I traded in my last car for a hybrid a few months ago, so that did some to help with the guilt of 4000 miles on the road. We try. And we live our lives. Home again, driving less, the car parked for days. Back to school shopping at the thrift store. We spent $45 last week and they got great 'new' in style clothes.

The garden is still producing even though it has been somewhat neglected. Its Florida in August. Ive been away and we all came down with a stomach virus upon our return. Bleck. School has started, the garden is calling my name, and i am starting to listen. I miss it but confess to being intimidated by mosquito's and heat. and weeds. Still. Mmm.. I ordered 30 packs of organic seeds from Baker Creek Heirloom seeds. My biggest seed acquisition to date..I had been wondering how you know when your cantaloupe is ready on the vine. Apparently, when the animals start biting into it, its ready. I was in the grocery store yesterday and saw cantaloupe 2 for $5. and it wasn't even organic. I have been eating cantaloupe from the garden every day. Me and the raccoons. The raccoons that ate the chickens while we were in NY. Try again soon.

Friend Erin is still with us. Ellie told me last week its like having a big sister. Yeah. A big sister that bakes and cooks and cleans. Awesome. For all of us. When she came in April we thought it would be for two to three weeks. Apparently, its working out pretty well.

My kids are ten. Growing up, maturing, having conversations. Ellie said to me the other night, you know mom, you're really lucky. I know I am, but why? Because you get to stay home. So many grownups would like to stay home, not have a regular job. Hmm... You're right, I love this life but you know... Over the years Ive had many friends, met many people, men and women who say they couldn't do it. Say they tried and then went crazy. Couldn't wait to get back to work. Staying home was too hard. Being with the kids all the time, too much. Too boring. Too little recognition. Not enough money. And you know what? It is or can be all of the above. Like everything else its not perfect. And its perfect. Its challenging for me sometimes, but i know having a full time, outside job would be too. We live a society that no longer values what can go into life at home. Emphasis being on what we do, how much money we make, what we can buy, instead of who we are and how we live.. But that is slowly changing. People are waking up, unsatisfied. Realizing the more more more lifestyle we've been sold and taught will never be enough and at the same time its too much for our planet. And still, at this time, women or men, who do opt to stay, live, work, play at home have to swallow our pride and at the same time have pride, in what we do as valuable and viable. And doing it our way. Whatever that entails. But doing it differently and beautifully. Having a life, being more than a chauffeur and consumer. Reaching out, continuing to learn. Growing own food. One less person on the road each day. One more child with a parent after school. My own mother worked and went to school all through my childhood. I was a latch-key kid from 10 on. It worked out fine. I'm glad my mother had those choices. It was never what i wanted for my own family.. (alright, neither was divorce but that's another story...) Grateful for the community manager gig, that helps us make it comfortably and teaches me patience, compassion and understanding. Dealing closely with neighbors and friends of such different personality, background and lifestyle. And somehow making it work, quite nicely really.

Im reading "The heroine's journey" by Maureen Murdock 'Womans Quest for Wholeness'. What a great book. A sort of, 'third wave', feminist book that is male positive, that values the art of being home and nurturing. A beautiful, spiritual book about personal and cultural transformation. I borrowed it from a friend and then bought a copy at the used book store so that I may share it with other friends. Check it out.